Disguises

Erin Soracco

English 101.21

November 28, 2012

Disguises

            The last two times I attended my service at Acts4Youth were very different than others.  I learned more about the students I did not know before, and the experiences with the students were a little different than normal.  My experiences can be connected to the play “Twelfth Night or, What You Will” by William Shakespeare.  In this play the character Viola disguises herself as a man when she enters a new land and becomes a service to the Duke of Orsino.  After all the falling in love by all the characters the twisted plot all comes back to the covering up and disguise of one’s own self.  The boys at Acts4Youth use this technique of hiding who they are sometimes because they may feel embarrassed, or they want to feel like another person to have the life they want.

            The day that I go to this school revolves around athletic training and skills the boys would need to be a good teammate.  Other days there are sessions where the boys are encouraged to talk about situations in their lives.  Even though I do not attend this day I have heard from other volunteers that the boys may not share everything because they could be embarrassed with what they would say.  Because of this they “disguise” themselves and almost forget about what really is going on in their lives.  Of course not every boy is from an unfortunate household but we are told as volunteers that a lot of them are, and this is why the program was started.  It is hard for young boys in general to express how they really feel and if they are embarrassed by something greater than a normal embarrassment then they most likely will not show emotion.  Covering up their real life is a way to go through living their life without thinking of the troubles they may be going through.  This is not the exact case of Viola, but overall she wanted to hide who she was and could not reveal that she was a girl.

            The boys may want to feel like they are a different person at times because of the life they may have.  For example, I was helping a boy with his homework who I had never interacted with before, and in the end he was crying a little because I was circling the math problems that he got wrong.   I had no intention of making him sad but he seemed that it made him sensitive and he was having problems accepting that he was wrong and could not take no for an answer.  This overall represents that hiding emotions and hiding what actually affects a person can be a good thing for the time being but in the end it may not be such a good thing.

            Hiding a true identity is done a lot and not always for the right reason.  The boys hiding their lives is not a bad thing at all because it may be hard for them to express what is really going on in their lives.  This is one of the most surprising things I have learned while doing this because unless you actually think about what the boys are going through you will never know.  As volunteers we can attempt to help them tell us what is going on and if we cannot at least we can try to help them in any way they need.               

              

Service

Coming to an End

As Acts 4 Youth is beginning to come to a close for me my eyes are being opened to many of the situations around me.  As I spend more and more time there I start to notice and realize a lot of things that make me sad.  I know that the whole reason we are there is to help these boys make it into high school.  We want them to do their absolute best in school and grow up to be great human beings.  But there are a lot of things that I have been noticing as I get to know these kids better and spend more time with them.

            So many of these boys are incredibly intelligent; at times they like to act like or seem like they don’t care but when they do their homework I can see the gears grinding in their heads.  They solve all their math problems, and can define many of their difficult vocabulary words without a dictionary.  But there is constant complaining from some of them about how none of this is important to them.  I don’t want to be a downer because I know that this program was made to help these boys grow up to be successful young men, but so many of them have already set their minds in terms of how much, or little, they want to succeed.  I remember when I was their age, and even a few years after that, the last thing I was thinking about was my future, which is talked about very frequently at A4Y.  I would say one of the biggest problems for these boys is that so many of them live in neighborhoods with older boys that they look up to, but who aren’t the best influence on them.

 This Monday I was sitting with one boy to do homework.  As he was going through his backpack a pair of sunglasses fell out.  He picked them up and looked at me and said, “See these?  These are my sunglasses I wear when I’m high.  They’re dark shade so nobody can see my eyes.”  I looked at him in shock and asked him again how old he was.  “I’m fourteen.  You don’t believe I smoke weed?  Here is my lighter.  I just chill and listen to music, it’s all good.”  I wasn’t surprised to hear that a fourteen-year-old was smoking weed because my sister, who is thirteen, has told me stories about kids in her grade smoking and how it annoyed her, but this hit me harder.  I know this boy.  I have been working with him for almost three months now.  I know his likes and dislikes, who he gets along with, and who he doesn’t.  I know how he works and the most efficient way to get work done when I am working with him.  Already this boy is going down a road that will get him nowhere.  He is incredibly talented at sports and he wants to be a big quarter back for one of the best high school teams in Baltimore, but he has been told that if he doesn’t work hard he will not be able to achieve this goal.  For the rest of the afternoon that one little incident kept bugging me.

I would say the most interesting thing I learned from service is how much of an effect it doesn’t just have on the kids, but on me as well.  Because of this I want to relate this all the way back to Kolvenbach’s article about the Jesuit education and service.  Service is so incredibly important and A4Y has really opened my eyes to this.  One of the best feelings is when the boys come running up to us when we get there to give us high-fives or hugs, or when they hear that A4Y is coming to an end for us and they have looks of shock on their faces.  They kept saying that we better be coming back to them after our Christmas break.  This makes me feel like I have done something for these kids, but how much exactly? 

            So recently I have been incredibly conflicted about my role in helping these boys.  I know I am there to help them achieve but at the end of the day how much of an influence am I actually making?  So many of these kids already have a path set for themselves, and others are so easily molded by the people around them, whether good or bad.  This program has had such an effect on me that I definitely will sign up again for next semester in hopes that I can make a real change for at least one kid.  

Event Analysis

 Gina Campanella

11/28/2012

EN101 Ellis

Event Analysis

                                                                Hummmmmmmm.......

         My second visit to Zen Meditation not only instilled a greater sense of inner peace than the first time, but it also felt relatable to the Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night written in 1600. After attending this event a month ago, I felt relived of my stresses and realized keeping concentration for one, simple hour felt eternal. I enjoyed my second session of learning how to meditate much more, because my nervousness was gone, so there was nothing hindering my experience. Although I tried my best to focus, my self-diagnosed ADHD kicked in. My mind wandered through the routine of my day, which was relatively mundane. My mind hovered over, and kept returning, to the discussion of crushes versus love. At first I imagined myself as Olivia, then Viola, and then I transitioned to memories of my own.

            Through personal silence and peace, some characters in Twelfth Night were able to find out what they wanted in love.  Olivia never shared her feeling for Viola with anyone; the only way she knew how she felt was by focusing in on herself and clearing her mind. The reader knew she had affection the moment Malvolio was sent to “return” the ring. Viola could not share her feelings for Duke Orsino with anyone because she was in her disguise. She had to listen to her inner-peaceful-self and figure out her feelings. I had to meditate and clear my mind of my school stresses in order to figure out what I wanted romantically. During Zen Meditation, I realized the boy I have been crushing on would be nothing more than a crush. I decided to plan ahead and meditate before I go out this weekend so that if I run into him I will be able to focus my mind on how I truly feel, not how I feel in the moment. The characters of this Shakespeare play have made me comprehend that keeping my feelings to myself may be better than sharing. In this case of romance, other people’s opinions can change my mind. I must stick to the obvious facts, and not create false hope!

            Making dream catchers and rainmakers, as well as learning about Native American history was my favorite event all semester!  I had seen a sign in Boulder with a picture of a dream catcher and put the date of the event in my phone two weeks in advance. Finally, the day had come to enter the multicultural room. I walked in and was overcome with a sense that I was the minority. There was tribal music being played in the background, and it seemed to me that everyone around me knew each other already. We had to wait a while, and in that time I was forced to mingle. I met a few volleyball players who I shared some laughs with, and I also bonded with two of the staff. These two groups of people did not judge that I came alone, and they appreciated my presence and sense of humor. I’m proud I went to the event and practiced having self-confidence. I’m also very grateful for the free slice of pizza and the amazing dream catcher I made. It may have taken me almost two hours to create a craft the size of a bagel, but it will hang above my bed forever!

Childlike Perception

Tiaira Walker

Childlike Perception

Everyone deserves to have a place where they belong. Everyone also deserves to be loved. Children often carry this belief at a young age because of their innocence. They fear no danger and they have no judgments. Shane, a western novel about a mysterious man who stumbles upon the Starrett’s farm, is narrated by a child, Bob. I recently attended a discussion reflecting on the experiences of someone who is homosexual. To some, this is also a mysterious entity that they have no knowledge about. Perception is very dependent on how old we are. Babies just love unconditionally. Adults judge without even blinking first. It’s a part of human nature. Acceptance is dependent upon this perception. In Shane, the young narrator accepts this man despite his unknown past. In life, we develop preconceptions about others, which decide whether we accept them or not, especially when it comes to how we perceive sexual orientation.

            Bob is first fascinated by Shane merely by what he wears. He comes riding in on a horse dressed in black; a true man of mystery in the west. As Shane is welcomed into their home he retains a hero-like stature for Bob. All of the Starrett’s embrace this childlike way of looking at Shane, like he could do no wrong. Marian is skeptical, but that changes. “He’s dangerous all right, Father said it in amusing way, then he chuckled. But not to us my dear…In fact, I don’t think you ever had a safer man in your house.” This was one of the first discussions the family had about Shane. I enjoyed the fact that Joe was wise man throughout the entire novel. He understood what wasn’t explained and didn’t question it. He just accepted it. If Shane would have initially told them about a dangerous past, would they have reacted the same way?

            In the discussion I attended. We observed the life of a man, from childhood up until his golden years. The music video, “Same Love” by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, depicted this. His whole life consisted of a struggle with others accepting his sexuality, others including him. As a child, he saw nothing wrong with the way he felt, but he himself began to feel like an outsider. When others found out they changed drastically, even his own father. Why couldn’t they look at this man with the same innocence the Starrett’s looked at Shane?

             We are naturally afraid of the unknown, the dark. We see that the Starrett’s shed light on dim situations by simply not judging. Had the man been welcomed on the same terms that Shane was, his whole life could have been different. It could have been a lot less hostile.Children perceive everything as magnificent and new. If we as a society can learn to embrace this, forever, then I think there is hope that we can all live in harmony and focus on what is more important. 

The Connections Between Shane And Tunbridge

Frances Amodeo

EN 101-21

Dr. Ellis

11-15-12

         When I showed up for my fourth week of service in all purple, such a traitor for rooting against my NY Giants I know, but I was embraced by the kids in such a way that it felt as though I hadn’t seen them in months.  When we all arrived at the gymnasium, it was time for my little second graders to do fitness.  I couldn’t believe how many of them were so anxious to do the pull up bar and show off their super strength.  First up was Jaden, and he was going at it like a pro. Still to go were Tobi, D’Asia, Ali and Sophia.  Each one of them was better than the next.  For seven year olds, I was so impressed and to be honest quite embarrassed that they could lift their own weight better than me.  I did get a big laugh out of them when “Miss Frances” could only do two pull-ups and most of them had done three, four or five.  Safe to say the FAC has become my new best friend.

         The kids in my special education class are absolutely precious and I look forward to seeing them all week.  When it was time for them to come to gym class I decided that we’d play their favorite game, flag football!  Their smiles were so radiant they just warmed my heart. It wasn’t long before we made teams, boys vs. girls.  Us girls were clearly outnumbered but we stepped up our game and took twice as many of the boys’ flags than they took of ours.  We had such a blast; I can’t wait to see what’s in store for next week!

         When I first started reading Shane, it was funny how quickly I related myself to him as a result of the service I do at Tunbridge.  The similarity wasn’t so much that I was riding around on a horse trying to move on from my gun slinging past, it was the fact that I was a complete stranger in unfamiliar territory and I was so kindly taken in and now feel like part of the Tunbridge family.  It was within a matter of minutes on the first day that I was receiving hugs and warm welcomes.  Another similarity of my experience is that the children I work with are just as wonderful and innocent as Bob Starrett.  And one of the nicest compliments I may have ever received was by one of the teachers saying that the students really look up to me, like Bob looks up to Shane. 

         Throughout the novel we encounter a number of significant themes and experiences.  One of the major themes throughout the novel is leaving behind one’s past and the incredible strength it takes to move positively toward the future.  Shane, a mysterious man who abandons his gun slinging past to start anew comes across the Starrett family while journeying through the Wyoming countryside on horseback.  He is taken in by them and soon becomes part of the family.  Although taken in with open arms, Joe and Marian seemed to question his past while their young son Bob thinks Shane is the greatest man in the world and looks up to him tremendously.  Bob’s great love and admiration for Shane brings up another great theme of the novel, the innocence of childhood.  Jack Schaefer purposely makes young Bob Starrett the narrator of the novel in order to read the story through the perspective of a child.  Schaefer exposes the idealisms of youth by portraying Shane as being “perfect” in Bob’s eyes.   We also see great symbolism in things such as the tree stump.  The tree stump was an annoyance that Joe Starrett had being dealing with for years.  It symbolized old struggles and when Shane came he helped Joe uproot it, which then showed their progression towards overcoming difficult obstacles in life.  Another significant symbol was Shane’s lack of carrying a gun.  In a way it symbolizes a stripping of his past life and moving on towards anew.  In the final chapters of the first half of the novel we encounter the fight between Shane and Chris, one of Fletcher’s men.  After the fight and the damage of breaking Chris’ arm and wounding Fletcher, Shane tells Bob that he must move on “because when a man kills someone, he is marked forever and must go.” 

Mike Oteri

Event analysis

November 15, 2012

Dr. Ellis

A Different Perspective

                On Wednesday November 14  I walked into McGuire hall, I had no idea what I would walk into, but I knew that this would count as an event for lit so I sat down and prepared to enjoy the speaker. The speaker was name Louis Eagle-Warrior; he is a Native American flutist and also historian that ALANA has asked to come to Loyola to speak about Native American culture.

                The audience consisted of only about fifteen students, which gave the event a very personal touch. Eagle-Worrier started out by playing the Native American flute, which he explained was on a different scale than musical instruments. After he finished playing he started right into history of Indians (which he prefers over Native-American). He said that there is an unfair stereotype that all Indians lived in tee-pees. Eagle-Warrior said that only plain Indians would live in tee-pees, and ride horses, while Indians in the north would have homes made from wood and leaves. Also, most of the clothes we may picture Indians wearing were only worn by plain Indians.  

                After playing another flute, Eagle-Warrior began to speak about some of the Evils of America.

                “This holiday thanksgiving, that you all will be celebrating soon,” he says, “Is really just celebrating when the white man killed 700 Indians, by calling them out of a meeting, then shooting them, if they did not come up quick enough they just burned them alive. Then the white man said today we give thanks for the dead Indians, and that’s what you all celebrate.”

                He said all this with such hostility that I could not help but thinking that it was my fault that this tradition continues. He also went on to explain how he does not like thanksgiving because we waste so many turkeys.

                Then he continues about the irony of America. Starting with Columbus, he told us how Columbus did not discover America but rather just raped and killed millions of Indians. Making this the largest holocaust in history. He said that if we are to have a Columbus day then why not designate a holiday for Hitler. He also continued to talk about the fact that America stresses safety from terrorists, but in reality America itself is really the terrorist.

                Diversity and Justice is a very important to justice education. Because just viewing injustice from a distance is not personal enough to make an impact ones life for them to make a difference. Though the words of Eagle-Warrior came from such a passionate, emotional place that sometimes they came off as offensive. Due to the fact that some of his words were overpowered with hate it was quite difficult to take his facts for truth. I suppose that this only strengthens the point we came across in the beginning of the course, that one cannot be passionate about an injustice unless they witness it firsthand. For me I was more concentrated on defending myself from the animosity that Eagle-Warrior was sending out, than being passionate about how Native-Americans were treated.