My day of conversational analysis
provided me with a greater understanding of interpersonal
communication. Specifically, I learned how influencial clothing,
facial ques, and body movement are in the communication process; and
was most intrigued with the effects of technological communication on
interpersonal communication. A better understanding of this process
has provided me with methods of improving my own communication style
which will surely lead to more fullfilling interactions and
relationships.
I did my analysis Sunday the 23rd.
This was the perfect day for this because I was free of any major
obligations. I started the day with a potluck at the meditation
center, then spent most of the day shopping for winter clothes. I
noticed the people at the meditation potluck were wearing loose, yet
comfortable clothing. One man was even wearing a suit which appeared
at least two sizes too large for him. Many of the dress' the women
wore were rather plain in design. Many of the men wore
relaxed-fitting jeans and plain polo shirts. My analysis of their
clothing revealed that these were people are more concerned with
functionality, rather than aestetics. They wanted the ability to move
more freely and weren't too ocupied with impressing others with a
strong fashion sense. I believe this style to be very approachable to
others. Although not entirely correct, I think many assume that
people concerned with “high fashion” are arrogant and vain
individuals. So by selecting plain and comfortable clothing they are
attempting to create an image antithetical to the fashion seeker: I
am humble and nonjudging. By noticing this I realized that personal
style-not just fashion-forward style- is a choice, determined by
personal beliefs, experience, and what message the person is
attempting to send to others.
While exploring the Towson mall with
my roomate, we encountered a myriad of styles and nonverbal messages.
Here I was able to realize the power of nonverbal ques and that
initial judgements of character by these ques are not allways
accurate. For example, I noticed people walking upright and others
slouching. Those who walked upright presented confidence and a more
inviting persona, while those who walked with their head down, with a
slouching posture, appeared less approachable and attractive. People
who slouched also appeared less noticeable to those around them. Then
I began to notice my own slouching. Being tall, keeping an upright
posture throughout the day is sometimes difficult, so I began making
the effort to walk with good posture. I noticed how people alter
their communication, depending on who they were with. For example,
employees speaking with customers were much more formal than friends
talking amongst themselves. Later when waiting in line for Coffee, I
took notice to the person in front of me. His arms and legs were
covered in tatoos and his septum was pierced. By his physical
appearance I initially imagined him hoping to cast a “keep
away/wasted youth” image onto those around him and jumped to the
conclusion of an equally less attractive personality. Even at the
time his facial expression appeared offputting to me. However, to my
surprise, after collecting his coffee he returned to his table with
(who appeared to be) his family. There I noticed him lauphing with,
and enjoying the company of his family, and I realized my initial
interpretation was incorrect. What I took from this was the
importannce of body language and clothing selection, and how these
affect the worlds interpretation of me. More importantly I learned
you can't allways judge a book by its cover.
What amazed me most was the effects of
technological methods of communication. More specifically, how my
cell phone seemed to hinder my interpersonal skills. Throughout the
day I took notice of how I communicated with others face to face,
versus phone, text, email, and Facebook. Face to face contact
definitely offered better clarity and understanding. This was because
I was able to take facial ques from the message sender. Through the
phone I was lacking understanding. This doesn't mean I was completely
lost in our conversation, but I realized I tend to imagine the other
person's facial ques when talking over the phone-which can clearly
lead to misunderstandings. Through text and Facebook, messages were
much shorter and even more open to interpretation, or misjudgement.
While there didn't happen to be any real issues this particular day,
I can imagine times in the past where I had inproperly interepreted
these messages. However, going without my cell phone for a couple
hours was not a major problem for me. I walked with a friend to go
grab lunch and I felt much less distracted, although a tad bit
disconnected with friends and family back home. I did however find
myself more engaging in conversation and even more interested in my
friend than usual. This is not to say I am not interested in him,
rather I felt more of a personal connection which prompted a more
lively conversation. By not worrying about an expected call or text,
I took more notice to my surroundings and the happenings of my
friend. This lead to the realization of the paradox of cellphones:
cellphones allow us to be more “connected” with others, while at
the same time cause a “disconnect”. I believe this to be most
significant because I can now see how cellphones can hinder
communication and relationships as well.
My day of communicative self analysis
was significant in many ones. It opened my eyes to the nonverbal
aspects of communication, and the power they have on interpreters. It
also allowed me to realize how cellphone usage can hinder
interpersonal communication. Through this process I have learned that
all people are constantly sending messages out to the world, so in
order to create strong relationships, it is important to present
yourself well, walk with good posture, don't jump to conclusions
about unfamiliar personal styles, and perhaps most imporantly, keep
the cellphone at home from time to time.
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